Fifty Shades Delusional: Chapter One
Sep. 21st, 2012 01:51 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
astra_auroraHello, and welcome to Fifty Shades Delusional, wherein I take on Fifty Shades Darker. Oh, the horror.
Due to the events of last night's post, I'm a rather bad mood today, so don't expect wacky hijinks.
We begin with a one-page prologue where Grey has a dream of his childhood- some bastard comes to his home, beats up his mother and then the dream ends just as he's about to do something bad to Grey. Grey wakes up and tries to forget.
Ouch. Have to admit, that's a pretty effective way to start- and it clearly tells us that we're in for a dark ride.
Chapter 1 begins with our resident fuckwit (also known as Ana) at the end of her first day at work- if you recall, she's the assistant to Jack Hyde, one of the bosses of the publishing company. This is also the third day without Grey.
Ana leaves work and heads home- she hasn't yet bought a replacement car, and Kate's still in Barbados, so she's sitting at home, all alone, probably listening to Sinead O'Connor and drinking cheap whisky.
She gets a delivery- two dozen white roses, with a card from Christian. The card basically says 'Hope work went well, thank you for the glider [she bought a model one for him in the last book- Astra], from Christian'.
Ana spends the next couple of days imitating Bella in New Moon, displaying so much fuckin' angst that emos would be raising their eyebrows and telling her to calm down.
And I'm calling it- Ana has some kind of eating disorder, because she spent about five days consuming nothing but Diet Coke and lattes. I'm no dietician, but I really don't think that would end well.
Ana gets an email from Grey at work. Remember how he agreed to go to Jose's show? Well, it's on, and he's offering her a lift because she doesn't have a car. She realises that her phone has been set to forward all her calls to the BlackBerry (thus, Grey's been getting all her calls by mistake) and that she really doesn't have another option, so she agrees to the lift and thanks him for the flowers. She changes her settings on the phone and calls Jose to get a time to arrive at the show.
The next day, before she leaves, Hyde asks if she'd like to go for a drink after work the next day to celebrate the end of her first week. Ana's not sure since, y'know, he's her boss. Grey turns up in his Audi (of course). He instantly starts asking her about when she ate, but given that she's lost about five pounds (that's like... two and a half kilograms?) and she looks like a skeleton, I'll give him a pass on that one.
They both concede that they've really, really missed each other and they're not happy. They're taking Charlie Tango (Grey's helicopter) to Portland, and on the way to the helipad... gah.
The familiar pull is there- I'm drawn, Icarus to his sun. I've been burned already, and yet here I am again.
Icarus didn't get burned. Icarus fell into the fucking ocean. Get your goddamn mythology right before the Muses come after you for being so bloody irritating.
Anyway, they fly over Seattle and make some small talk. When they get to Portland, Ana gets mad at Grey for being his controlling self again. He puts her off by promising that they'll talk about it on the way back, since they're in public.
Jose's show is going well when they get in, and Ana's really happy for him. He starts to warn her about something, but he gets dragged off for an interview. Ana and Grey look around at the photos, which are gorgeous- and then they come across a bunch of candid photos of Ana.
I'm probably wrong about this, but isn't there some kind of legal issue here? Jose took a bunch of photos of her, without knowledge or permission, and then exhibited them, again without knowledge or permission. That sounds pretty illegal to me.
Grey buys all the photos so they won't end up as fap material for some random- and honestly, I can understand why- and then they have an argument. Grey wants her to be relaxed and happy around him. Ana tells him that he needs to stop intimidating her, and he says that she needs to be more clear and communicative. And then Ana finally grows a pair.
I take a deep breath. "Christian, you wanted me as a submissive. That's where the problem lies. It's in the definition of a submissive- you e-mailed it to me once." I pause, trying to recall the wording. "I think the synonyms were, and I quote, 'compliant, pliant, amenable, passive, tractable, resigned, patient, docile, tame, subdued.' I wasn't supposed to look at you. Not to talk to you unless you gave me permission to do so. What do you expect?" I hiss at him.
His frown deepens as I continue.
"It's very confusing being with you. You don't want me to defy you, but then you like my 'smart mouth'. You want obedience, except when you don't, so you can punish me. I just don't know which way is up when I'm with you."
Thank you! Christ, that needed to be said! I like this Ana way more than the one from the first book.
Grey decides that it's time for them to go eat. Ana says she wants to stay, and then we get another argument!
"You've seen the photos; you've spoken to the boy."
"His name is Jose."
"You've spoken to Jose- the man who, the last time I met him, was trying to push his tongue into your reluctant mouth while you were drunk and sick."
"He's never hit me."
Oh, snap!
Ana's really, really pissed off, so when she says goodbye to Jose, she wraps his arms around his neck to piss off Grey. It works. As they walk down the street, he pulls her into an alley and kisses her. After more angsty banter, they leave to go eat.
That was Chapter One. Hold on to your hats, people.
Due to the events of last night's post, I'm a rather bad mood today, so don't expect wacky hijinks.
We begin with a one-page prologue where Grey has a dream of his childhood- some bastard comes to his home, beats up his mother and then the dream ends just as he's about to do something bad to Grey. Grey wakes up and tries to forget.
Ouch. Have to admit, that's a pretty effective way to start- and it clearly tells us that we're in for a dark ride.
Chapter 1 begins with our resident fuckwit (also known as Ana) at the end of her first day at work- if you recall, she's the assistant to Jack Hyde, one of the bosses of the publishing company. This is also the third day without Grey.
Ana leaves work and heads home- she hasn't yet bought a replacement car, and Kate's still in Barbados, so she's sitting at home, all alone, probably listening to Sinead O'Connor and drinking cheap whisky.
She gets a delivery- two dozen white roses, with a card from Christian. The card basically says 'Hope work went well, thank you for the glider [she bought a model one for him in the last book- Astra], from Christian'.
Ana spends the next couple of days imitating Bella in New Moon, displaying so much fuckin' angst that emos would be raising their eyebrows and telling her to calm down.
And I'm calling it- Ana has some kind of eating disorder, because she spent about five days consuming nothing but Diet Coke and lattes. I'm no dietician, but I really don't think that would end well.
Ana gets an email from Grey at work. Remember how he agreed to go to Jose's show? Well, it's on, and he's offering her a lift because she doesn't have a car. She realises that her phone has been set to forward all her calls to the BlackBerry (thus, Grey's been getting all her calls by mistake) and that she really doesn't have another option, so she agrees to the lift and thanks him for the flowers. She changes her settings on the phone and calls Jose to get a time to arrive at the show.
The next day, before she leaves, Hyde asks if she'd like to go for a drink after work the next day to celebrate the end of her first week. Ana's not sure since, y'know, he's her boss. Grey turns up in his Audi (of course). He instantly starts asking her about when she ate, but given that she's lost about five pounds (that's like... two and a half kilograms?) and she looks like a skeleton, I'll give him a pass on that one.
They both concede that they've really, really missed each other and they're not happy. They're taking Charlie Tango (Grey's helicopter) to Portland, and on the way to the helipad... gah.
The familiar pull is there- I'm drawn, Icarus to his sun. I've been burned already, and yet here I am again.
Icarus didn't get burned. Icarus fell into the fucking ocean. Get your goddamn mythology right before the Muses come after you for being so bloody irritating.
Anyway, they fly over Seattle and make some small talk. When they get to Portland, Ana gets mad at Grey for being his controlling self again. He puts her off by promising that they'll talk about it on the way back, since they're in public.
Jose's show is going well when they get in, and Ana's really happy for him. He starts to warn her about something, but he gets dragged off for an interview. Ana and Grey look around at the photos, which are gorgeous- and then they come across a bunch of candid photos of Ana.
I'm probably wrong about this, but isn't there some kind of legal issue here? Jose took a bunch of photos of her, without knowledge or permission, and then exhibited them, again without knowledge or permission. That sounds pretty illegal to me.
Grey buys all the photos so they won't end up as fap material for some random- and honestly, I can understand why- and then they have an argument. Grey wants her to be relaxed and happy around him. Ana tells him that he needs to stop intimidating her, and he says that she needs to be more clear and communicative. And then Ana finally grows a pair.
I take a deep breath. "Christian, you wanted me as a submissive. That's where the problem lies. It's in the definition of a submissive- you e-mailed it to me once." I pause, trying to recall the wording. "I think the synonyms were, and I quote, 'compliant, pliant, amenable, passive, tractable, resigned, patient, docile, tame, subdued.' I wasn't supposed to look at you. Not to talk to you unless you gave me permission to do so. What do you expect?" I hiss at him.
His frown deepens as I continue.
"It's very confusing being with you. You don't want me to defy you, but then you like my 'smart mouth'. You want obedience, except when you don't, so you can punish me. I just don't know which way is up when I'm with you."
Thank you! Christ, that needed to be said! I like this Ana way more than the one from the first book.
Grey decides that it's time for them to go eat. Ana says she wants to stay, and then we get another argument!
"You've seen the photos; you've spoken to the boy."
"His name is Jose."
"You've spoken to Jose- the man who, the last time I met him, was trying to push his tongue into your reluctant mouth while you were drunk and sick."
"He's never hit me."
Oh, snap!
Ana's really, really pissed off, so when she says goodbye to Jose, she wraps his arms around his neck to piss off Grey. It works. As they walk down the street, he pulls her into an alley and kisses her. After more angsty banter, they leave to go eat.
That was Chapter One. Hold on to your hats, people.
